The Tears You Don't Cry Are Killing You
Growing up, I was the super sensitive one. The one who would cry when barely yelled at, cry when I felt something or someone was being treated unfairly, and the first one to cry at movie scenes and commercials. It didn’t take much for me to cry and let’s be honest… it still doesn’t take much for me to cry! Overtime, I learned that crying as frequently and as easily as I did was seen as weak and in order to be strong," I couldn't let others see me sweat." I had to be strong by keeping it moving, stuffing my honest emotions, and pretending as if everything was all good.
Does this sound familiar? As you were reading, did an image of someone pop into you mind that fit this description? Was it you?
Of course, this was not learned because someone taught this to me intentionally... I learned by observing the world around me. Many people are walking around wearing a mask that is barely holding on, maybe you are that person.
Oh the lies that the pressure of society gets us to believe. This is the reality of so many and it’s not one person's fault. These lies have been passed down generation to generation starting with the king of lies.
February 2019, I was diagnosed with Hashimotos disease which is a thyroid disease. I had no idea what it was and felt completely blindsided by it. For the most part, I have always been healthy so how could this be possible? Since my grandmother died in 2017, I have become more passionate about my health and my well-being. I had lost a good amount of weight, ate a pretty healthy diet, began working out more, and even became a yoga instructor. The doctor informed me that it wasn't a big deal because there was medication I could take on a regular basis that would take care of the issue. While there is nothing wrong with medication and is necessary in some cases, I had a strong pull on my heart to try the holistic approach to healing in this case..
Through this journey, I believe God showed me that the emotions and feelings I have stuffed for so long had manifested into illness. This revelation has changed my life and has forced me to speak truths that I have never said out loud, evaluate and develop boundaries, redefine self-care, and say "no" more without any explanation or guilt. I haven't figured it all out yet but I have felt the release of some pressure. Much of my healing has come through tears... some of the tears I have cried, I believe, have been for others who can't.
As I have grown, I have come to learn that tears are not weakness but my tears are actual evidence of strength. My tears are evidence that I am courageous enough to let go and make space for healing and freedom. My tears are evidence of healthy resilience.
Tears are healing waters.
Beloved- let your tears flow freely to release the secrets of pain held so deep in your heart. Cry because you are happy, sad, joyful, sorrow, grief, love, and pain... let it out! Emotions are energy and they have to go somewhere... even if that means manifesting into physical and/or mental illness.
I invite you to dig deep and do the work. Allow the tears to flow... because the tears you are unwilling to cry will kill you. Although the trauma you have experienced is not your fault, you have a choice in healing. I know it can feel overwhelming and confusing on how to start your journey of healing. I encourage you to start with releasing your tears... your tears are healing waters.
In Love & Light, Jaralyn Roberts